The day he ran out of courage

The day he ran out of courage
was because the light was missing.
Just like that. No more, no less, no space … margin
suddenly it just faded
He had two seconds of panic,
briefest moments of anxiety
but suddenly it ended, he became mechanical
devoid of humanity.

Given the unimportance of everything.
everydays where the same, all day
words came out of his mouth but he seemed mute to himself
even the unexpected things… he already knew
Everything became indifferent
long hair,
nails cut close,
prayers, groans
Everything was the same thing since then
there is no longer musical scales
all notes were mi
everyone packed up,
and traveled without luggage
stuffed their belongings in boats
and stayed watching from the shore
as if they kept the arrows and shot the bows
as if, by not having material possessions,
everything was paid off:
– Equal rights for animals
– Parity between punk and jazz
– End of bad credit
– Equitable distribution of envy

But the great revolution
was the end of the Portuguese Stew
everything was started to be made by hand
bobbin lace with Chinese mesh
Communism was caught mingling with the Church
and when they thought that the anti-christ would be given birth
The result was flatulence in a lady from France
whose means of subsistence were shale statuettes
He took a pill and ended the problem
The Holy Communistic Church was discovered
everything became system’s fault
and static’s
Every week the existence of God was voted
and when there was sponsorship
the rain had gas and sugar and really came from heaven
everything was innovation … or decline

From here where he looks at himself, things have not changed much
is the same joy, the envy, the whine, the singing
one dies and is born of the same ways as always
exhausted Death, comes Life
Life passes in a moment
and before we notice it has been harvested
not by that skeleton with a scythe and black shattered rags
Life gives you what has and ends, just like that, nothing else
and by wider avenues or narrower paths
one day one will have to keep on foot
by the same road

It doesn’t matter arriving by truck or sneakers
no matter one’s interests
nor whether if one is in good health or with hurting groin
if one was stingy or kind

what matters is what matters
but knowing what this is
is everything.

Ti, 26/01/2010

Yashodhara.

Yashodhara.
Do you know that name?

Prince Siddhartha, Gautama,
Sakyamuni, Buddha.
Everybody knows these names…
… but…
… Yashodhara?

Yashodhara was married
to Siddhartha.
She loved him dearly.

One night Siddhartha left her
and their son, Rahul …
… while they were sleeping,
to seek Enlightenment…
… to become Buddha.
He did not even say
a word to her when he left.

Yashodhara has shown
compassion for the sick
… and ailing long before
Siddhartha ever did…
… long before Siddhartha
was even aware of suffering!

Who can say if he owed
his Enlightenment to her?

Pema …
Perhaps Yashodhara wanted
to leave Siddhartha and Rahul.

How can we ever know if Yashodhara
fell victim to anger …
… to loneliness or bitterness…
… after Siddhartha left her.
Who even thought about her?

What must she have said
when Rahul, her son…
…asked that eternal question:
Where is my father?
What must she have told him?
How could a mother leave her own
child in the middle of the night?
lt is only possible
for a man to do.

Tashi, only for a man.

After that,
Yashodhara had no choice.
She had to lead a life
of renunciation.
She cut off her hair …
… and lived like an ascetic.

Oh Tashi …
lf your thoughts toward Dharma
were of the same intensity …
… as the love and passion
you have shown me…
… you would have become
a Buddha …
… in this very body …
… in this very life.

Pema …
Forgive me.
l am going back with you.
Back where l belong.